USED TO BE CELEB
Hey! You know who I am. Once upon a time you saw my face everywhere. I was—well, not to be too modest, but a long time ago I was quite the celebrity, quite the man-about-town. Restaurateurs would see me coming a mile away. Bartenders actually doffed their hats to me and women lined up for blocks just to see my face and get my autograph. Well, then times got a bit rough, you know. The offers stopped coming. I was getting older and fatter and it was—well, time for the fresh blood to take over. The younger guys were getting more of the attention. I guess it had to end sometime, right? To think I actually thought about filing bankruptcy—I was truly scared. For a time there, I thought I wasn’t going to make it through. Then I met John K., and read his new book about money. Wow! My life has changed for the better. This man is a miracle worker. Would you believe I have more money now than I had when I was the top box-office draw? That’s right! Now I can travel to my heart’s content. Now I can order an expensive meal in New York or San Francisco and not even think twice about it. So buy John K.’s book right away. You’ll never worry about money again. John K. is an experienced banker who knows all about what it takes to get rich. And I don’t mean just wealthy and comfortable—I mean billions upon billions of cold, hard dollars! The choice is yours. Just call this toll-free number to order. Welcome to the land of plenty!